Records Department: Agent 's after mission's report. File#3577314025487448795

Monday, April 21, 2008
Family troubles an idiot superhero teams.
I've been busy too busy to work on my presidential campaign. The damn skrulls have taken up all my time, last I heard Hank Pym set up some fight between him and I think Private Hudson, I really didn't listen to him.

Any way Jason Todd quit, he's been acting suspicous, he could be a skrull I need to check on him. So I flew to Gotham. I find him through his credit card purchases; he's in a ratty apartment in the worst section. I don't get it; Bruce Wayne is his adopted father why the hell is he in this rat trap?

I make my armor disengage and go in street clothes. I step over a crack head getting a fix. I knock on his apartment door and it falls off. “Jason?" I ask as a rodent the size of a small dog runs by.

He comes out of what I guess is a kitchen with Justice Briefs Mirai's kid. What the hell? Well this could explain why Mirai is all pissed lately.

“Mr. Stark?" He stutters.

"Please Tony, Mister Stark is my father.” I look over at Justice. "Is that you're girlfriend?"

“No I have too much hair, and I don't need Viagra just to wake up in the morning."

The two teenagers squabble for a bit and Justice leaves. “Nah Vella put her up here in an apartment, because her Dad canceled her credit cards. This is the only place she could afford."

“And you're here why?" I question.

"Because I don't want to run to Bruce."

" Ah." I respond. “You mentioned Vella is she?"

He gives an evil grin "Well she is wearing my leather jacket."

Well he's defiantly not a Skrull. Skrulls and saiyans find each other disgusting. Are at least that's what Mirai tells me. “Jason I want you to come back to SHIELD. All of us are in danger, and I'd like to get us all back on the same page. I've made a deal with Batman but he doesn't trust me, he does you the Skrulls are taking over, and we need all the heroes on the same page. "

He stares at me. “I’ll think about it, but first I need to go back to dinner.”

I shake my head. "I can't let you do it."

“Excuse me?" He looks like he may be going for his crowbar.

I put my hands up to reassure I'm not attacking. “I can't let you live in this hell hole. Justice either. Tell you what go to the Gotham Heights Apartment Suites, show this card this will Identify you two as my guests, It will give you two access two the Penthouse, there are three bedrooms three baths, and room service all the amenities.

“Tony I won’t accept a handout." He snarls.

"It's not. I can't let someone I fought alongside live in this trash heap. Consider it a gift."

"But wouldn't the owner of that place have a problem?"

I smile. “I am the owner. Please accept the offer, you two stay here, you'll die."

“Okay fine." He mutters.

I fly back Towards SHIELD HQ At least knowing those kids will get out of that dangerous flop house. “Armor!" I order. “Call Mirai Briefs."

His number flashes on screen with the word dialing... Finally he answers. “Tony?"

“Yes Mirai, I'd like you to know Yi just saw you're daughter, and she's fine."

He screams at me so loud that he it echoes through out the helmet. “I have no daughter!" Then he hangs up.

Alright. That was strange. Well whatever it is I'd better stay out of it. As I think I might be able to take a little time to plan my strategy against the Skrull invasion, an alarm comes up. “Mister Stark? This is Commander Hill, You should see this."

It was the registered team that was sent to West City their leader, was saying how he'd rid the city of Vampires Saiyans ETC. I slap my forehead. I didn't tell that moron to call out Legacy. I want to integrate all the heroes, not have them keep fighting each other. Damn it I swear if this keeps up I'm going to have them reassigned to Antarctica.

“Commander Hill, teleport me to California. I'll see if I can handle this."

I find them actually fighting the Legacy kids and losing no surprise some of these guys came out of Camp Hammond with a C minus from the instructors, while The Legacy Kids have training from some of the best on this planet, Hell I know The JLA, and the Titans have trained with them before. Plus what they learned from their individual mentors.

“Stop this! Stop this now!" I order.

“Ut oh you're trouble now!" Lizard boy gleefully shouts. “The Avengers are gonna kick your butts."

I grind my teeth. “Do you see the Avengers here? Now stand down I ordered you not to start fights with these kids! When I talk to you what do you here Hunter?"

We didn't start the fight! Batgirl Punched Ninja Witch!"

I look over at the girl who seems to be wearing a new costume. “Why did you punch her?"

“She... Wanted to steal my ...boyfriend."

I think I see what's going on they were trying to goad Legacy in a fight. “You guys go home. I'll deal with The "Forcers"."

Anthony gets in my face. His armor looks different now. “Did you send them after us?"

"We'll discuss this at home Anthony, but I assure you I do not have a Vendetta against you."

He seemed satisfied while the others were a little Apprehensive. “Okay you idiots! You bunch are all on probation one more slip up I’ll Post you In the Negative Zone Got it?"

“But sir!" One of them whines.

“One more word and I'll change that to Mephisto's Realm. Or how about Darkseid's planet?"


Hunter now gets in my face. “We’ll go above you Stark."

“There is no above me. Fury deals with SHIELD business, but I'm the head of the Initiave. Now listen to my orders some jackass assigned you here, And when I find out who it is he's going to get fired, and you lot will be reassigned until then I do not want a superhero gang war Tat will tear West City apart got that?"

"Yes sir." He backs down.

"Good remember I'm watching you." I teleport back To SHIELD HQ, I hope this is it. But if not Well Darkseid's going to get some new neighbors.


3 testimonials:

DOn't worry Iron Man, Darkseid may be faster and more seductive, but he's not stronger. You can totally take him.

Anonymous Anonymous Testified...

Just the person I wanted to see

Blogger Nepharia Testified...

Personally, I wouldn't get involved with the family problems. Stick to the idiot superhero teams: much safer.

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